She may be in the country over the actual Christmas period ie on the day, but I suppose the last thing she wants is to see with an outstretched arm and a camera, grinning inanely over the parsnips and red cabbage.
My friend Michael, who I remind you set me this bet, is currently happier than the proverbial 'fat kid with cake'.
As I've said before, he is now almost certain to win it, as I'm still 68 handshakes short of my target and have only 77 days left. He's therefore been swanning around like some sort of Aristotle. Not only that but he's also just started work shifting vases around the stage of the Garrick Theatre (his first job for about 3 years) and has been talking about Edward Fox, the lead actor, as though they're best mates.
...And to cap it all, would you believe it, he even got someone of the female gender to accompany him home last week and apparently, she isn't, as I suggested a cycloptic lady with an eye-patch.
I thank everyone who reads this website (about 3,200 'hits' per day at the moment) and who has been sending me supportive and well-wishing emails (firstname.lastname@example.org), although I apologise that I often can't reply. I'm getting quite a few you see, and I still have to keep up with the day job.
Just to answer a couple here:
Jason, no I don't support West Ham or any other team that sounds like directions to a bucher's shop.
Martha M. from Cleveland Ohio, thank you, yes a number of people have suggested I turn this into a book in the future. In fact I recently said to a friend of mine "You never know, one day there may be a book written by me, sitting in bathrooms up and down the country," to which she replied "yeah, but I'm sure most people would still find toilet paper cheaper."
Finally, to Gwen, Mr Orange, Skinflint and Teddy, who have all asked me how I find contact details for the 500 celebrities, truth be known, with difficulty, but I've recently found that Spotlight can be helpful.